Understanding AuDHD: Megan’s Personal Journey

Introducing Megan, a 24-year-old who has been diagnosed with both ADHD and ASD. In this heartfelt poem, she shares her personal journey, offering insight into the challenges and strengths that come with these neurodivergent conditions.

When an individual is diagnosed with both Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) and Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), this combination is often referred to as AuDHD. This term highlights the coexistence of both neurodevelopmental conditions in a single individual.

Embracing My Neurodiversity: A Personal Journey with ADHD and ASD

I always wondered why, why I was different to the rest. Why I couldn’t focus, concentrate, why I was always second best. I never had too many friends, I struggled to fit in. I struggled with relationships, the feelings I had within. I struggled with a lot, but I always got by, but getting by wasn’t easy. But now I know why.

ADHD, that’s it, it’s me. Not just that but also ASD. So, there are reasons as to why, why I had problems getting by. My brain is wired different, that’s it. That’s why. So, there are reason to why I forget all you tell me, trust me I try to remember but I can’t, it’s just me. I do try to concentrate but there is chaos in my brain, 100 different conversations, memories it drives me rather insane. But it’s also rather fun, when it’s not driving me insane. It gives me bursts of energy, lots of productive things happen when I feel that way. But trying to multitask is something I shouldn’t do. It goes rather wrong, so it’s something I try not to do.

ADHD and ASD aren’t just me, it doesn’t define me, but it’s part of me. I’m glad to be different, different to the rest. I’m glad I’ve always been second best.

Getting diagnosed was a relief, it explained who I am. Why I am this way and why I have always struggled to get by. It was noticed at school but never taken any further, school just got harder and harder. Slower and slower. My grades dropped; I didn’t know why. I tried so hard, but I couldn’t get by. You may ask why it was missed at school; well, it wasn’t missed I was just always sad and alone left feeling small. The signs were there so they say, so why was I left feeling that way? Despite all the challenges. There were things I loved, liked graphics and art. Those are the things that made me feel smart. I’ve always been creative, it’s a big part of me. I can hyper focus, that’s the ADHD. So yes, it isn’t all bad, I’m glad it’s part of me. It makes me creative, it makes me, me.

People call me Dory; my memory is a thing of the past. So yes, I can keep a secret, because I’ll forget as time goes past. So don’t worry what you tell me. I’ve already forgotten, see. I have the same conversation multiple times a day, I often repeat myself, it’s always been that way. I’m now medicated for my ADHD; I’m medicated to help me get by. You may ask about medication how it helps and why. So let me explain how it helps me get by. It’s a bit like reading glasses, it focuses your eyes. With me it’s my brain, it helps me with all the things that drive me insane. It helps me focus; it helps my thoughts. Helps my brain feel less out of sorts. It increases the neurotransmitters in my brain, makes my brain more level again. So that is why I choose that pathway, it’s not a weakness to ask for assistance not all things can be done alone for instance. For me it’s a mix of both medication and therapy, it helps me get by and me find me.

You know what. I love the way I am, through all the hard times, it’s me, I am who I am. Although it took many years to find out why I am this way, now life is easier, I have brighter days. I smile, I laugh, I have fun. When I got diagnosed is when my life really begun. My identity was found, my life was found. I could tell people I am who I am. The relief that came with being diagnosed was a thing I’ll remember, the confusion in my brain became lesser and lesser. Although I still struggle each day, I now know why I feel that way. ADHD is part of me but not all of me, ASD is part of me but not all of me. They don’t define me; they create part of me. I am me not them.

Call to Action

Megan’s journey is a testament to the strength found in embracing one’s neurodiversity. Have you or someone you know experienced similar challenges? Share your thoughts and stories in the comments below. Let’s continue the conversation and support each other on this path.