Regulating Your Nervous System After Burnout or Trauma
Regulating your nervous system after burnout or trauma isn’t about slapping on a face mask and pretending you’re not two sips away from a breakdown. It’s about crawling back to your body after life, stress, and possibly a narcissist or three, have completely fried your internal wiring.
You know the feeling, when your hands are shaking, your brain’s buffering, and some well-meaning person says “just breathe.” Cute. Let’s toss that in the bin and start from scratch.
This is the stuff that actually works, written by someone who’s been through the meat grinder and came out still swearing but standing.
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What is your nervous system and why is it sabotaging your entire existence?
Your nervous system isn’t out to get you. It’s just trying to protect you… badly. Think of it as a poorly trained bodyguard who mistakes emails for death threats and sees burnout as an incoming tiger attack.
There are two main systems playing tug of war in your body:
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Sympathetic nervous system
Fight, flight, freeze, fawn. The high-alert system. It gets you out of danger but will also gladly ruin your afternoon because someone used the wrong tone in a text. -
Parasympathetic nervous system
Rest, digest, recover. This is the one you want in charge when you’re not being chased or emotionally blackmailed.
When trauma or chronic stress shows up, your nervous system stops regulating like it used to. It gets stuck in survival mode, either buzzing with anxiety or flatlining with exhaustion.
Why regulating your nervous system matters after trauma
Because your body has memory. It holds every red flag you ignored, every panic spiral you white-knuckled through, every toxic situation you couldn’t escape fast enough. If you don’t actively work on regulating your nervous system, you stay stuck in that loop, reacting like you’re still in the danger long after it’s over.
Actual tools for regulating your nervous system
Let’s get into it. These are practical, no-BS ways to start regulating your nervous system again. No oracle cards required.
Get into your body
You cannot regulate your nervous system by thinking harder. Trauma isn’t logical. It’s biological.
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Walk barefoot on something real
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Touch something textured or grounding
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Pay attention to what your body’s actually feeling, not what you think it should be
Cold water (without the cult vibes)
You don’t need to Wim Hof your life. Just:
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Splash cold water on your face
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Stick your hands in ice water for 30 seconds
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Take a brisk shower
- Or an ice bath. Trust me, that’s the stuff!
It activates the vagus nerve, which is your nervous system’s reset button.
Shake it the hell out
Animals do it. You should too. Trauma leaves tension in your muscles. Let it move.
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Shake your arms and legs
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Bounce on your heels
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Do something that makes your body feel like it’s releasing instead of holding
You’ll look ridiculous. You’ll feel better.
Vagus nerve stimulation for real people
These things help regulate your nervous system by signalling safety to your brain:
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Humming (try the eternal om. It’s magic)
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Gargling
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Singing
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Deep belly breathing (not Instagram breathwork; the kind that feels real and grounding)
Eat like someone who isn’t self-destructing
Blood sugar crashes will keep your nervous system in freakout mode.
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Eat regularly
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Eat protein
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Eat food that didn’t come from a fluorescent packet and a desperate impulse
This isn’t about dieting. This is about fuelling the meat-suit so your nervous system can chill.
Orient to the present moment
Your nervous system needs proof you’re safe. Give it that proof.
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Name five things you see
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Touch something soft or grounding
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Say what day it is and where you are
Your nervous system doesn’t know the threat is over until you show it.
Sleep. Seriously.
Regulating your nervous system without sleep is like trying to fix a car with no engine.
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Turn off the phone an hour before bed
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No caffeine past 2pm
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Build a sleep routine like your life depends on it, because it kind of does
Boundaries are nervous system gold
If your life is full of people and situations that drain you, no regulation technique will work.
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Say no
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Leave the group chat
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Cancel plans if your body says “don’t”
Your nervous system is asking for less chaos. Listen.
Move your body how it wants to move
Some people regulate by sitting still. Others need movement. There’s no one right way.
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Try walking
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Try stretching
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Try dancing like you’re exorcising a demon (because you probably are)
Your nervous system will tell you what works. You just have to stop ignoring it.
Make space for your anger
Repressed rage clogs your system.
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Scream in the car
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Write the letter you’ll never send
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Punch a pillow, not a person
Your nervous system wants honesty. Let the anger out safely so it doesn’t rot inside you.
So… regulating your nervous system
Regulating your nervous system isn’t about becoming calm all the time. That’s not the goal. The goal is to not live in survival mode when you’re trying to make breakfast. It’s about finding your baseline again, that place where your body doesn’t think love, work, or laundry is a threat.
You’re not overreacting. You’re just dysregulated. And you can fix that; slowly, imperfectly, one moment at a time.
Come back to yourself. Your body’s been waiting.
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